A Mother Driven by Guilt

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What I’m about to describe for you happened during the 60’s when I was a teenager. It was a crazy time for me. I had just turned 18 and all I could think about was sex it seems. My cock was constantly hard and it was very frustrating for me. I knew nothing about sex and the only available insight came from magazines. They weren’t designed to teach you about sex however. They were the only way you could see a naked woman and dream what it would be like to be with one or touch them.

Looking back, I realize that I wasn’t even knowledgeable enough to know how to masturbate to help relieve the pent up frustration. I know it felt good to squeeze my hard-as-nails cock, but I simply didn’t know that I could have jacked off and received temporary relief. Instead, I took to humping my bed or pillow while imagining a nude girl beneath me which just added fuel to my fire.

It’s all I could think about, but luckily nature revealed to me, quite by accident, that if you kept pulling on your cock long enough you’d find that eventual release your mind and body craved.

The first time I ever had an orgasm, it felt wonderful, but shocked me too. It felt like I was going to piss all over the place but I was incapable of stopping my hand. As I waited for my stream of piss to begin I ejaculated a stream of cum half way across my room. I remember some talk about cum and correctly deduced that this white slimy goo that came out of the same hole my piss came out of, was, in fact, cum. I was elated to find a release valve for the pressure I’d felt for so long.

After my first orgasm, I found myself jacking off nearly ten times a day for the next three months. What a feeling! I couldn’t get enough and there was no better feeling than cumming. Now whenever I saw a nude pic or anything that was remotely sexual in nature, I knew that at least I could use it later with satisfaction.

I was a nice looking kid, but I was terribly insecure when it came to girls. I lived alone with my mother and she had been divorced when I was 2 years old, so I really had no father figure to give opinions from a male perspective. Mom had bad dealings with most of the men in her life, and a lot of it turned out to be trouble of her own making.

Mom was a very attractive 38 year-old. She had short dark hair and fair skin. Her 36C tits were enhanced by her small frame and her ass was heart-shaped. Her stomach looked as if she’d never had kids. In spite of these attributes, she was pretty much an introvert. She lived off State Aid and did some sewing jobs that met our needs just barely.

Growing up, she was always telling me how she hoped I’d turn out differently than most men. All they wanted was sex by her accounting. She told me women didn’t really like sex for the most part and only did it to pacify the husband or to procreate. I found myself feeling guilty about the feelings I had concerning girls and would mentally chastise myself for being like the men my mother told me about, so my early years of puberty were extremely disconcerting.

Mom basically didn’t date for years. It was just the two of us for the most part and growing up we were always casual in our attire around the house. As I neared graduating high school, I started seeing my mother in a different light as the hormones began kicking into overdrive. I saw her naked a few times in the past, but until now I never really saw, or considered her in a sexual way. If anything, the very idea of mom and sex was repugnant to me.

We would sometimes ride our bicycles across town to my aunt and uncle’s house and a guy driving by would give her a cat call or whistle and I would literally be sickened at the notion that someone could even see her in a sexual light. Although I was 18 at the time and understood that she was an attractive woman, I couldn’t wrap my head around someone ever seeing her as desirable sexually. “Hey, you sick fuck, that’s my mother for Christ’s sake,” was what came to my mind whenever that happened.

That all changed one night when I woke up sick to my stomach. I jumped out of bed and burst into the bathroom, making it just in time to throw up into the commode. Mom was taking a bath at the time and was lying low in the water. I saw her jump with a start just as I was doing my nose dive into the john.

“Mike, you can’t just”…but she quit talking when she saw my problem. She was concerned about me and stepped out of the tub and began consoling me, holding my forehead in her hand as I heaved my guts out. She knelt next to me, still naked, and held me until I was through. Then she guided me to the sink to wash out my mouth and splashed water on my face.

She grabbed a towel, but instead of covering up, she dried my face with it, put her arm around my waist and led me back to bed, still naked. She sat on the bed with me a few moments just wiping my sweaty forehead as I looked at her bare tits through squinted eyes. Then she got up and walked to my closet to get an extra blanket for me. I saw her incredible ass as she walked away and her hair covered pussy bahis firmaları as she returned. In spite of how sick I felt, my cock started to harden.

When she sat down on my bed again, I asked, “Will you lay with me for just a minute?” I was using my illness to prolong my unadulterated view of her body. She seemed to hesitate until I put my arm around her waist and moved my head to her lap. I remember my nose coming into contact with her pussy hair and I was in heaven. She reached across me to pull up my blanket more and her tit pressed into my ear as I felt my cock jump. Her movement pushed my nose even closer to her pussy and I will never forget the smell of her.

Shortly after that, she lifted my head to my pillow and stretched out next to me above the blankets. I just looked at her tits and and her flat belly before she covered herself with the towel she’d used on me before drifting back off to sleep. I was terribly conflicted while committing to memory my first up-close vision of a naked woman.

Later I felt the bed move as she moved to leave my room. I barely opened my eyes and saw her great ass as she disappeared around the corner outside my room.

After that episode, I found myself constantly looking down her blouse or trying to see her panties when she was lying down with just a robe on. I was obsessed with seeing more of her.

She loved to put her legs on me when she lay on the couch. I’d start to rub her legs and she would moan and tell me how good it felt and would eventually fall asleep. I would keep rubbing her but my hand was going ever higher as I would push the bottom of her robe up until I could see her panties. My cock would become so hard it ached, but I didn’t want to get up and maybe screw up staring at her pussy. When she woke up my head would be turned toward the TV and she’d get up and go to bed. I’d jack off and cum 30 seconds later. Then I’d jack off about 3 more times before going to bed myself.

Every great once in a while, she’d be invited out with a couple girl friends to go to some bar to watch a band that was playing. She usually came home feeling no pain and her attitude toward me always seemed more amorous. She’d marvel at how tall I was getting and tell me what a stunning man I was becoming. I’d asked her if she met any nice guys out there and she’d tell me a few bought her drinks and how some would try to get her to go out to their cars.

“Does it make you feel attractive?”

“If they’re nice to me, sometimes it does.”

“Well, I’m a nice guy and I can tell you that you’re more attractive than any of my friends’ mothers.”

“Aww, you’re so sweet to say that.”

“Hey, Mom, I mean it. That’s not BS I’m giving you here.”

“Man, I’d love to find a man out there that’s even close to the man you’re becoming.”

“Thanks, Mom. I wish Julie felt the same way you do.”

“Why? What happened? I thought she liked you.”

“So did I. She told me I need to work on my kissing and that it left a lot to be desired. She said it in front of some other girls and they all started laughing. I was embarrassed so I just left.”

“That was a cruel thing for her to do, Mike.”

“I suppose.”

“Really! I mean it. What’s so terrible about your kissing?”

“I don’t know. She said I keep my lips too hard and that I don’t use my tongue. Hell, I didn’t even know a tongue was used in kissing.”

“It’s called a French kiss, sweety.”

“Now see, I’ve never even heard of that.”

The entire kissing story was bull shit. I just thought that if I could get her talking about sexual matters, she’d be inclined to be more open with me and maybe let me know what girls like and explain how to do things.

“How did you kiss her?”

“The same way I kiss you. Anyway, I guess I won’t be getting to kiss any more girls once word gets around. I mean, where do you go to take lessons?” I asked facetiously.

She seemed to be thinking of what to say next.

“Now look, Mike. You can never say anything about this to anyone.”

“I don’t plan to.”

“No, I don’t mean that. I could probably teach you how to kiss a girl, but you could never say a word of it to anyone.”

“Why would I do that? I mean, you can’t exactly brag about how your mother taught you how to kiss.”

She laughed at that. “Good point. Okay, why don’t you show me how you kissed her,” she said as she moved closer to me.

I put my arm around her shoulders and laid the most God-awful kiss on her I could imagine. Her lips were soft and the booze and mint gum were on her breath, giving me a start on a hard on. I kissed her for about three seconds and then sat back.

“Okay, why don’t we try it again, only this time, don’t pucker. Just let your lips try to be as soft as mine and mold them naturally on mine.”

This time around, I lowered my head toward hers, closed my eyes and put the softest kiss I knew how to do and held it until I could feel her begin to pull back, probably 10 or 15 seconds.

“Wow,” she said, “you’re a quick learner.”

“Was kaçak iddaa that a good one?”

“Exceptional, honey. I almost forgot I was kissing my son there.”

“What about the tongue part?” I asked her.

“I can probably explain it to you, but it’s probably too intimate for a mother and son.”

“Why? Only you and I will know about it.”

“I don’t know.”

“That’s okay,” I said looking disappointed. “Thanks for trying to help, Mom.”

“Aw, sweety, I want to help more but we’re kind of crossing a line with this.”

I didn’t say anything. I wanted to see if she would give in with the sullen attitude I was displaying. Besides that, I had a feeling that she was more concerned about controlling herself than what I was going to do.

“Okay, Mike. First off, you begin to kiss normally like we did that last time. Then you open your mouth a little and gently begin to caress my tongue with your own.”

“Okay. Shall we try it?”

“Okay.”

Again, I lowered my mouth to hers and began kissing her as sensually as I could. After about a half minute of this I opened my mouth and she opened hers. Our tongues entered each others mouth and began their dance. My cock was beginning to harden up a lot as the kiss continued. I felt her arm reach up and begin to pull my head gently into her own. We were making out and it was the hottest thing I could possibly imagine. Mom was really getting into it as I put my hand to her face and softly caressed it before putting it behind her head and pulling it into mine.

I knew I was onto something that I could use again to maybe go further, but I had to stop before she did so that she’d think I was just using her as a teaching tool and not trying to bed her. As I pulled my head away, I looked at mom and her eyes were still closed and there was a look on her face that I’d never seen before. Finally, her eyes opened and she just stared at me.

“Oh my God, Mike! There was absolutely nothing wrong with that kiss. It may have been the hottest kiss I’ve ever experienced. No one is ever going to complain if you kiss them like that.”

“Thanks, Mom, for everything. I didn’t know that kissing could feel that good. I probably could have gone on kissing you all night.”

“Thank you, Mike. Now if you will excuse me, I need to use the bathroom.”

Her face and upper chest were flushed as she wobbled to the bathroom. She looked turned on to me as far as my limited experience was able to determine. My cock was still rock hard and I decided I needed to use the bathroom as soon as she came out. She was in there about 5 minutes before finally exiting and going toward her bedroom.

I hurried into the bathroom and sat on the john and started stroking my cock when a very familiar smell hit my nose. It was the smell that greeted me for the first time when mom sat on my bed that night and inadvertently pushed my nose toward her bare pussy. I thought of her masturbating to what had just happened and I blew a wad that went clear to the wall. I cleaned up my mess and headed to my room in anticipation of reliving our night of kissing before cumming a few more times.

As I passed mom’s room I saw her trying to get her bra off and struggling with the clasp. Finally, she took the shoulder straps off and turned the clasp toward the front, freeing her tits. I watched as she pulled her panties off before slipping into her nightgown. I wanted to touch her ass so badly as it came into view. I continued on to my room before she saw me standing there, my cock again hard.

Sometime during the night I had to get up to take a leak. As I approached my mom’s room I noticed that her bedside light was still on. She was sleeping soundly so I continued on to the bathroom.

On my way back I spotted her panties still lying on the floor. I went into her room. I figured if she woke up and caught me in there I’d tell her I was just going to shut her light off.

I lifted her panties and quickly smelled the gusset. There was that smell and they were still wet. My cock hardened again as I watched her sleep. I pulled my cock out and started masturbating while watching her sleep and holding her panties to my nose. It was scary and hot all at the same time. As I began to cum, I cupped my hand over the end of my cock to catch the cum. When I was done, I returned her panties to the floor and returned to my room. I couldn’t believe I had just jacked off in my mom’s room.

About two or three months later she was again invited out with the girls on a Friday night. This time she didn’t get home until about 3 a.m.. I was sleeping on the couch. I felt her sit down next to me and gently shake me.

“Mike, honey, you should probably get up and go to bed.”

“Hey, Mom, did you have a good time?”

“It was alright.”

“More guys hitting on my beautiful mom I’ll bet.”

“Yes. And none of them had the class or sensitivity that you have for me.”

She was more drunk than her last time out.

“That’s because I love you, Mom.”

“I kaçak bahis love you too, Mike.”

“You look a little down tonight.”

“I guess I just felt like being in the company of a man tonight and they were all jerks. Why can’t they treat me like you treat me?” and she started to cry

“Come on, Mom. Let’s get you undressed and into your nightgown and then I’ll fix us a cup of coffee.”

“Will you help me?”

“Of course, Mom.”

We went into her room and I started helping her undress. I was unbuttoning her blouse when she said, “I really shouldn’t allow you to see me naked.”

“Why not, we’ve seen each other naked many times before.”

“I know, but I can’t help feeling it’s not right.”

“That’s that guilt you carry around like an anchor,” I said as I continued undressing her.

“What do you mean by that?” she asked as I removed her blouse and unzipped her skirt.

“Remember when you told me that women don’t really enjoy sex?”

“Yes.” She said as she bowed her head.

“That was just you feeling guilty about liking sex.”

“How do you know I like sex?”

As I began to unclasp her bra I said, “No one can kiss as passionately as you and not like sex.”

I watched as her 36c tits came free from her bra and had to keep my cock from blowing up by concentrating on talking.

“You think my kiss was passionate?”

“More passionate than any girl I’ve ever been with! Why don’t you stand up now so I can get your panties off.”

As I bent down to slide her panties off, my face ran the entire length of her torso as my forehead touched her tit. I was shaking with desire.

“Oh, Mike, I had a terrible time tonight,” she said. I began pushing them down over her beautiful hips and that smell came to me again.

“Why? What happened?” I put her nightgown over her head and began to pull it down. The backs of my knuckles brushed each of her tits as I did.

“I met this nice looking guy tonight and I wanted him so bad.”

“How is that terrible?” I asked while finishing with her nightgown, staring at her gorgeous pussy until it disappeared.

“He kept buying me drinks. My girlfriends were ready to leave and this guy convinced me to stay and said that he would drive me home.”

I led her out to the kitchen and sat her down and started to brew some coffee. “I’m still waiting for the terrible time you mentioned. Did you have sex with the guy?”

She started crying so I went over and knelt in front of her and held her close.

“What happened, Mom?”

“He asked me to sit in the backseat for a bit before we left, so I did. Then he was all over me and was very rough. He just hoisted my skirt pulled my panties to the side and stuck it in me. I asked him to be sweet like he had been all night and he started laughing at me. In 5 minutes it was all over with. He never said a word after that other than to ask where I lived so he could drive me home.”

“I’m so sorry, Mom.” I meant it too. She was so deflated from her ordeal and I found my desire for her put on the back burner as I tried to make her feel better.

I stood up and leaned over her. Taking her face in my hands I kissed her on the mouth as softly and sweetly as I could before continuing to finish the coffee. She looked at me with surprise and love all at the same time.

“I shouldn’t have told you all of this. It’s not right.”

“Hey, Mom, all we have is each other. If it’s the last thing I do, I’m going to get this guilt you carry around out of your life.”

She began crying again and said, “I love you so much, Mike.

“I love you too, sweetheart.” It was the first time I ever called her anything but mom, but it felt right.

“Honey, I know this may sound odd, but will you sleep with me tonight? I really don’t want to be alone.”

“Of course I will. And you know what, fuck that guy from tonight. He’s the asshole that doesn’t know a good thing when he sees it.”

“Mike! You shouldn’t use the F word.”

“You know what, I want you to say it.”

“The F word?”

“Yes. Say fuck that asshole.”

“I can’t.”

“I promise you, you’ll feel better if you do. Come on, say it.”

“Fuck that asshole,” she almost whispered.

“Louder, Mom.”

“Fuck that asshole.”

“Louder.”

“Fuck that asshole,” she said out loud and started to giggle.

“See, now doesn’t that feel better?”

“I love you, Mike,” she said smiling.

“Here’s your coffee. We’ll drink this cup and then we’ll head to bed. Okay?”

“Okay,” she said softly.

We stayed at the kitchen table drinking our coffee and just looking into each others eyes. Somewhere along the way tonight I misplaced my carnal desires. I no longer felt the need to fuck her. I had, in fact, developed an overwhelming desire to make love to her.

I undressed down to my underwear and crawled in beside mom under the covers. She lay on her side away from me and I moved up next to her and spooned her with my arm around her. She took my hand and brought it to her mouth and kissed it. I tried not to think about how close we were. I wanted to provide her with the love and support she needed and I didn’t want my hormones interfering with that.

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