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Half way between wanting and not wanting to believe him, I was surprised, both by what he had done, and by what he had said to me. I crumpled to the floor as though my legs forgot that they were supposed to hold me up. Sitting there, on my plush mahogany colored carpet, I reached up and touched my breasts then my nipples. They tingled as though his hands were still on them. I felt warm and achy all over, but instinctively I yearned for his touch yet again. Willing my legs to move, I pushed myself up to my knees and struggled over to my bed.
I began hoping against all odds that Brian was joking with me even though, somehow, I knew that he was not. Using the bed to stabilize myself for an attempt to stand again, I began to make one of my many mental checklists as to what I should bring with me.
“Wait a minute,” saying to myself, pacing the length of my room on slightly unsteady legs. “I can’t really be thinking about going? What if he finds out about how I really feel about him?” Coming to an abrupt stop in front of my closet, I lightly smacked my brow as reality finally set into my hazy brain, “What am I saying? He saw the picture. Of course, he knows and now he is going to…. No, I can’t even think about what he has in mind.” I suddenly became frantic with fear and excitement.
Thinking was proving to be difficult as I heard Brian’s words drifted through my head. “I’ll take you camping with me tonight. Be ready.” Knowing that this would be my only chance to explain why I had the picture, I reached in front of me and opened the closet doors. Groping along the top shelf until I found my small duffel, I pulled it down and tossed it onto the floor at my feet. Looking through my collection of clothing, I tried to decide what to take on the camping trip as I tossed one thing after another over my shoulders, not finding anything that would work. Maybe if I were to look in my dresser. Dashing over to it, pulling open my underwear drawer, I move around the boring old panties that I wear everyday.
Sighing in frustration, “None of this will work. I just cannot go to him wearing something that I wear everyday. I have to have something special for tonight.” Pulling out a pair of black shorts and a pink T-shirt, I hurriedly dress as I head for my door. I grabbed my car keys and my purse, as I slipped feet into flip-flops. Quietly, I walked down the hallway, not wanting Brian to know that I was leaving the house. Making my way down the stairs, paying more attention to finding the right key than to where I was heading, I did not notice Brian standing there at the bottom.
“Going somewhere, Erika?” He said to me in his smooth masculine voice.
The shock of hearing his voice caused me to come to a sudden stop on the stairs, just two steps from the bottom. Standing eye to eye with him did nothing for my nerves. “Uh… I was… going to the store. Maybe… uh… get something for tonight.” I started to bite my lower lip, half expecting him to tell me to go back up to my room.
He leaned close with one arm resting on the rail, inhaling deeply once he came close enough. Wrapping his free arm around my waist, he pulled me close until only a scant inch separated us. His peppermint-laced breath caressed my lips as he said, “I do hope that you will…,” again inhaling my scent, this time closing his eyes as though he found it intoxicating, “Hmmmmmmm, purchase something alluring. Oh, and get your hair done as well.”
With him so close, my heart was racing, my breathing heavier; I was drawn to him. Keeping my eyes locked with his, I stood there watching him as he moved out of my way. Taking his hand off the railing, he held it out to me as though to guide me down the remaining steps. Putting my hand in his, I let him do just that. On impulse, I stood up on my toes and briefly touched my lips to his then turned and all but ran to the front door.
Just as I went out the door and was about to close it, I heard Brian call out to me, “Make sure whatever you buy is white.”
My destination was simple for what I needed. In our area, there was only one mall and that was a good thirty-minute drive from my hometown. Having a clear idea of what to get, I set out for a specialty store that I knew would have just what I was looking for. Once I got there it did not take me long to find exactly what I was looking for. In fact, the sales woman acted as though she was expecting me. She assisted me in picking out a beautiful silk gown with lace on the cups and hem, as well as a few other things like panties and a bra for the trip. I had a feeling that Brian would like it. Wasting no time in buying it, the sales woman seemed to sense that I was in a hurry, I signed the sales slip and walked as quickly as possible back to my car. Taking a bracing deep breath once I climbed in, I stared the engine and practically sped home.
Another thirty minutes later, I noticed that Brian was not there, but kartal escort bayan thankfully neither were my parents. Hoping that Brian would not pick that moment to come driving up, I grabbed the bag containing my purchases, bolted out of my car, sprinted to the house and into my room. Feeling the wall shake with the force from the slammed door, I leaned against it as laughter caused my body to tremble. Oh, how good it felt to laugh over all this. The tension from my fear and excitement eased a bit as I stood there. That is until I heard a car pull into the driveway.
If there were ever an Olympic event for flying across a room from door to window I would have gotten the gold medal that day. Looking out, breathing a sigh of relief, for the car I saw was not Brian’s, nor was it my parents’ car. Nevertheless, my curiosity was still aroused, wondering whom the driver was since it was next to impossible to see from my location. Knowing that the sound of a car door opening and closing did not reach my room during my dash to the window and figuring that the driver was just lost, I turned my back on the window.
Excavating the duffel from under a pile of clothing, I began to pack the things one would need for an evening such as the one planed. Of course the typical necessary items were added, such as a sleeping bag with built in pillow, two changes of clothes, my new black bikini that took me almost a month to talk my mother into allowing it, my hiking boots, and of course a small travel case of basic toiletries. Having added my new things to the duffel as well, I heard a car door close.
I jumped up and over my bed to get to the window before the person moved beyond my view so I could see who it was. Peering out onto the drive, I saw a breath-stealing site. Brian was leaning on the front fender of the driver’s side of the same car, and he was looking right at me tapping my watch. Wondering why he was driving another car, but not caring and not wanting to keep him waiting, as I grabbed my duffel bag. Making a mad dash down the hall and stairs, I was scared that he might leave without me. Coming to such a complete halt at the front door I almost smacked right into it.
I just stood there behind the front door, with my hand on the handle, for a few heartbeats trying to calm down. Brian would probably tease me for running out to him. Taking a deep breath and holding my head high, I opened the door and wet out to meet the man of all my fantasies.
Closing and locking the door behind me, I turned to walk down the steps of the front porch. Watching Brian walk around the front of the new car, I had to stop and admire how he looked in the suit he was wearing.
Wait, Brian was wearing a suit. He never wears a suit unless it is a real special occasion. It was an elegant, double-breasted navy blue suit with blue pin striping that was just a shade or two lighter. He looked as though he could be going to a wedding… or a funeral. I could not take my eyes off him, the only way to describe the sheer impact he had on me could be defined by just one word: stunned.
Not able to move from where I was standing as though transfixed by his fluid movement towards me. He stopped about three feet in front of me, looking at me up and down with a critical eye.
*Tsk tsk tsk, hmmm no,” shaking his head in disapproval. “This won’t do.” Brian began to walk around me in a small circle, continuing to look me up and down, pinching my ass as he walked behind me, causing me to jump. Coming back to stand in front of me again, he stood there staring at me for another moment longer. He took the final steps to stand close enough in front of me to be able to inhale his distracting aftershave, looking into my eyes. “I guess we will just have to rectify this.” Grabbing my hand, he took my bag and all but pulled me to the car he was standing next to when I saw him through the window.
Of course, his actions confused me. As far as I knew he was taking me camping, but apparently, he changed his mind. Getting to the car, he opened the door and motioned for me to get in. Curiosity alone stilled my tongue from asking him what he was planning. Once we were both in the car, Brian half turned to me, smiled, and leaned across the center consol. Again, he inhaled my scent as though he could not get enough.
“Hmmmmmmm, you smell great, Erika.” He said in a husky voice.
“Uh, thanks.” The timber of his voice and the pure lust in his eyes did nothing to help my nerves, as he continued to lean over. Not given a chance to think, his soft lips connected with my own as my eyes closed on their own. This kiss was not wet or insistent, or even too eager like all the other kisses I had experienced from boys that I had met at parties. Brian’s kiss sent jolts of pure excitement right through me, straight down to the juncture of my thighs. I felt myself growing damp more and more the longer he kissed me. Brian’s tongue grazed my lips, I felt an over whelming escort maltepe urge to open them for him. His tongue became harder on my lips, pushing into my mouth, forcing me to open them for him. As his tongue met mine, hotter, more intense, jolts that can only be described as electricity hit me.
The kiss deepened, making me start to feel a bit scared and I started to pull away. Brian must have sensed my fear, for he gently put his hands on either side of my face until the feeling pasted. To this day I am still not sure how long we sat there, in the car, kissing. Nevertheless, by the time Brian had ended the kiss, rather abruptly for my liking, my brain was again in a fog.
I could not answer.
“Erika?” He gave a small, amused sort of laugh. “Are you going to be ok?”
“Hmmm” Licking my lips, nodding my head as I opened my eyes. He had not moved away and he was looking at me with what must have been a mirror of my own mounting desire on his face.
Leaning forward again, he kissed the tip of my nose then leaned back, a strained smile on his face. “If I don’t stop now, we’ll never make our flight. But first, we have a stop to make.”
Feeling confused and I knew that I had to ask, “Flight? But, I thought we were going camping?”
“Oh?” Brian said as he started the car. “Well, while you were gone I decided that it wouldn’t be right for you to have your first time in the middle of the woods. So, I thought it would be better if we went somewhere else.”
By now, we were on our way across town. “And, this somewhere else is where?” Looking around, I noticed that we were town shopping district. “Uh, Brian, what are we doing here?” I asked as he pulled into the parking lot of a women’s clothing store. “I thought you said that we had a flight to catch? Shouldn’t we be going to the airport?”
“Oh, we will, but first there are a few things that we need to get for you.” Getting out of the car, he turned to me, “Will you promise to stay right here? I will promise that I won’t be too long.”
Not waiting for me to answer, Brian turned and walked into the store. I did not quite understand what he was up to, but I went along with it if it meant that I could finally be with him. Fear, excitement, and tangles nerves were all rolling around inside me. I was scared for the simple reason of I was not sure that I could sexually please Brian the way his past girlfriends had, and also, obviously, of the unknown. With the fear came excitement because of the unknown, hoping that I would be able to please and satisfy him. Because of all of this, my nerves were in such a tangle that I knew, with a doubt, that if this was another one of Brian’s cruel jokes, I would be devastated.
Looking back on my life, all the fights we had while growing up, all the silly pranks we had played on one another, and I never thought any of it would lead to this. The fact that I had fallen hopelessly in love with my own brother was, granted, very odd, but to me it felt right. The few people that we have known over the years, not only here, but also elsewhere, always remarked that we looked nothing alike. Our father, even at the age of fifty, still has the build of his youth, thanks to regular workouts with our mother. Anybody can tell right away that Papa and Brian are father and son with just a glance. To be honest the only difference between the two is their ages and the fact that Papa has a few gray hairs at the temples.
Since father and son appeared to be carbon copies of one another, one would think that the same would be true for Mama and me. Nothing could be further from the truth. Granted, my mother does seem to be almost too young to have two children fully grown, she really is not. She married Papa not long after she turned 18 and Brian was born with the first year, I came along four years later. Mama and I are as two sides of a coin, in looks as well as temperament. One could say that we are as different as night and day, yet we had never really had any large arguments. Mama’s hair is a dark brown that looks almost black, where mine is a soft strawberry blonde. My own temper has a tendency to flare up at the slightest provocation, which is why Brian enjoys teasing me so much. At the same time, Mama was known to able to weather any storm, real and figuratively; with a grace and strength, that surprises me. Over the years, she has called me her skinny-mini girl, because of my small stature, while at the same time calling herself a fat old lady. Do not get me wrong, Mama is anything but fat. Yes, she does have a few extra pounds, but she is far from being over weight. Besides, Papa has always told her that he like the extra pounds on her. He says she gives him more to love in the bedroom. At that point, I usually either leave to room or tell them to get a room.
Sitting in the car, with my nerves, the way they were, for twenty or so minutes started me to thinking that all this truly was just a huge pendik escort prank that Brian was going to great lengths to pull off. Taking a deep breath, noticing that I had been doing that a lot that day, I opened the car door and climbed out. Just as I started walking around the car to head for the store, here came Brian with about four or five shopping bags that looked to be full of stuff that he bought not only in the clothing store but also in the shoe store that was right next door.
Puzzled, “What’s in the bags?” Watching as he walked over to the trunk.
“I thought you promised to stay in the car?” He did not bother to look at me.
Trying to sneak a peak into one of the bags, I stated, “I didn’t promise. You just didn’t give me a chance to say anything before you took off.” Starting to lift up the tissue paper from a clothing store bag, “So, what’s in this one?” I did not bother to hide the giggle in my voice.
He must have heard the rustling of the paper, for he snatched the bags away, telling me that I would find out once we got to where he was taking me.
Again, I had to ask, “Where are we going, though?” I said this as leaned against the trunk of the car.
Laughing, he looked at me with obvious hunger in his eyes, pushing away any thoughts in my mind that this was just an elaborate prank, “Don’t be so impatient. You’ll find out soon enough!” Leaning over to give me a quick kiss on the mouth, Brian took me by surprise.
As he pulled away, too quick for my liking, I crossed my arms over my chest and huffed, I must admit, like a child that was denied a treat, “I hate surprises. Why can’t you just tell me?”
Having finished with putting the bags into the trunk and closing it, he merely stated, “Because I want to see the look on your face when all is revealed.” Pulling me away from the trunk, he escorted me to the passenger side of the car.
His words “when all is revealed” made the hair on the back of my neck stand on end, like when it always does with one of his pranks. Panic slammed into me with the force of an out of control freight train. Pulling out of his grasp as he opened the car door, I backed up a few steps. Hurt, fear, panic, and dying hope were all laced into my voice as I said, “Brian, I hope this isn’t another joke. With everything that has been happening so far today, I do not think that I could handle it if it were.” Lowering my voice, else somebody we knew happen to be walking by. “The kisses you gave me? Moreover, in the way you caressed my body. I do not think that any feelings that I have for you would be able to survive if this were just another one of your bad jokes. On the other hand, maybe just a new way for you to torment me, like when we were kids. Please, Brian, please tell me what is going on. If I mean anything to you at all, please at least tell me where you intended to take me and why. I mean, other than the obvious reasons.” I balled my hands into fists so tight that my nails were practically biting into the tender flesh of my palms while my arms remained straight and ridged at my sides. Which Brian knew to be a sign that I would not move until he at least answered my question.
Finally, after waiting for what seemed like an eternity to me, he took a deep breath and told me, letting his breath out slowly as he did so. “We are going to Las Vegas.” He walked over to me slowly with both of his hands held out to me. “I just wanted your first time to be unforgettable. In the years to come, I want you to remember this time with a secret smile on your face that will make your future husband wonder at what you’re thinking about.”
“But what is the real reason for us going to Vegas when we can just as easily get a room here or go camping instead? Why is it necessary that we go to Las Vegas?” Doing my utmost best to keep the pleading sound from my voice, but I knew that I had failed miserably.
The smile that I loved so well returned to Brian’s handsome face. Raising a finger, he said, “Ah, for that we will have to go to Vegas.” Taking hold of my hands, forcing me to relax, he pulled me into the circle of his strength. Whispering into my ear, “Please trust me, String bean, I would never let anything hurt you if I could help it. I love you too much for that to happen.” This time I heard the pleading in his voice along with another, deeper, emotion that I was to afraid to name.
Any normal person would have been upset upon hearing their lifelong tormentor call them the one name that they hated most in the world, but who said I was normal. Being in his arms and hearing his voice, I could tell that, for the first time, he meant the name as an endearment, and I loved him even more for it. Giving him a small squeeze, I pulled back to look into his eyes and giving him my own small smile, “Then let’s go to Vegas,” daring to wink at him, “and have some fun.”
Laughing, he kissed my forehead, pulled out of the embrace, and nodded toward the car. “Let’s go then.” Opening the car door for me again, he said, “Your chariot awaits, milady.”
Not able to stop myself, I let him assist me into the car. I was still laughing when he got into the driver’s seat. Leaving the parking lot, we made our way through traffic to the airport.
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