Holy Joe

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I felt like a cheat at times. My family had brought me up extremely religiously. We went to church on Sunday’s, sometimes even twice, and I had to attend various bible classes during the week. As a child the few friends I had outside school were from the church and mum and dad usually disapproved of any little friends I brought back from school so I just stopped doing it. If they could have afforded private school, I would have been there instead of having to mix with the heathen hordes at the local primary school. However any bad habits I picked up at school were soon beaten out of me with a good old round of bible reading and prayer meetings.

They weren’t bad parents and, in fact thought they were the epitome of good parents so I struggled to get my head around the bible until I could recite it almost word for word. That pleased them as they wrongly assumed that if I could remember it then I must understand it. I could never understand with so many illegitimate children in the bible why it was so wrong to talk about it in the real world.

By the time I went on to grammar school, the other people knew what my home life was about and I constantly had the piss taken. Thankfully I excelled at sport and was the star of the school soccer team. That also gave me enough muscle power to see off any of the school bullies. I wasn’t a bad looking teenager, well built, dirty blonde hair which had a habit of drifting on to my face and thankfully, a lack of acne. The girls seemed to like me, though I think the religious thing scared them off.

My sexual interests were non-existent. I knew about sex (no thanks to my parents whose idea of the “birds and bees” was to tell me not to do anything). I looked at the girls in school and their budding breasts and wondered what they might look like naked, but equally, I looked at the boys on the football pitch and, thanks to the showers I did get to see what they looked like. I found both quite stimulating which worried me at the time as I wasn’t sure what that meant.

By third year, I was being invited to join guys from school for visits to the cinema or to do the round of town centre shops on a Saturday afternoon; my parents were as enthusiastic as a nun at an orgy. Their answer to my sudden interest in the outside world was Roseanne. Guess what, this poor girl had been brought up exactly the same as me but had sadly been at a private school run by the church so had been indoctrinated to think that even saying the word “sex” would get you pregnant? We were introduced at a dinner party set up for the occasion.

Now please don’t think she was a dog, she was actually pretty but in a giggly, cutesy sort of way. I just couldn’t think of her on her back with her legs in the air pleading to be fucked (and that’s a word I couldn’t say in polite company either). To be honest, sixty minutes on one of these makeover shows and she would have been good enough for the catwalk but all her personality and charm had been sucked out of her by her overbearing parents.

Our early “courting” was chaperoned by one or even all four parents. All Roseanne would talk about were her various theories on the bible and its stories. She liked a few pop groups but most of them were obscure and squeaky clean. She had told me that she was going to keep herself pure until her wedding night and even “touching herself” was forbidden. That’s why she talked so much about anything but love and sex. By this time, I had developed a healthy imagination and though still a virgin, I had developed ingenious ways of ensuring that I could dispose of any white fluid created by my nocturnal exercising without the “Gestapo” (i.e. my parents) finding out I was having evil thoughts.

I started work at age 18 and at, last had some freedom. By then, Roseanne and I had been an item for three years. My job in local government meant that I managed to develop a small social life on one or two nights a week in a mixed group. I had secretly started having a few drinks (absolutely taboo in the Simpson household) and by being careful how much I drank, had managed to conceal it from them.

Something else had happened too. Leo, a guy at work, told me he wanted to have a party and would I come. Obviously it was out of the question but with some careful planning we invented a training school in London which meant a Thursday overnight. Of course I was going nowhere near London and, after work I was round to Leo’s flat to help him set things up. I liked Leo a lot. He was always attracting the girls but he would actually flirt with me, asking if my cock needed some exercise and if I couldn’t have girls, he would be happy to give me a little training. It was light hearted banter but I found it erotic and with him being 24, I liked the attention of an older person.

The party turned out to be more of a “get together” with five of us guys and five girls, some from the office. We drank quite well, more than I had ever drunk before, and after a few hours someone started handing around spliffs. This was really new to me as I didn’t casino oyna even smoke I did not not have a desire to smoke tobacco, let alone weed. I did try some though and the buzz was really quite pleasant. By this time we were down to Leo, Tina (from the office), me and Mark, who was a guy in his thirties that Leo knew.

Mark passed out and we dragged him through to the single room and left him on the floor, returning to chat. Leo managed to get around to my virginity and religion. Tina, much the worse for booze, said she had never had a virgin before as all her boyfriends had been older than her. She was quite a common kind of girl and looked to be about 22. I had the feeling that she wasn’t saving herself for her wedding night.

“Why don’t you let Joe here give you your wish then?” said Leo looking at me.

“Eh?” said I, puzzled.

“Let’s see you in action Joe. Tina would be happy to take whatever you want to give her, wouldn’t you Honey?” he said.

“Oh yeh,” she said, “I’m as horny as fuck with that weed.”

“Let me show you what I mean Joe,” said Leo.

He started to take off his shirt!

The booze, the weed, the circumstances, all left me in a stunned daze as Leo started to strip, eagerly assisted by Tina who started to act like a bitch in heat. She had no inhibitions and was soon topless. I sat stunned looking at my first set of female breasts. They were pale, small but amazingly firm, curving slightly upward at the end. I always imagined women would sag! I watched in awe as she stripped and she was soon sitting in just a pair of white briefs through which I could make out the dark shape of her pubic hair. I had concentrated so much on her, I had taken my eyes off Leo so when his erect cock was pushed in her face it was almost surreal. It was also highly erotic.

“Eh maybe I should go and leave you to it?” I said hesitatingly.

“Maybe you should do no such fucking thing,” said Leo. “Get your pants off and get your cock over here. I presume you’re hard?”

I looked down at myself and I was, indeed brick hard. I started to slowly take off my shirt when Leo came over, his cock dangling almost in my face, as I was kneeling and he was standing. He pulled my shirt over my head. His cock actually brushed against my cheek, leaving a damp trail of pre-cum which excited me no end. He actually started unclipping my jeans and Tina, blitzed out of her head, crawled across and kissed me on the lips. I fell backwards on to the sofa and this gave Leo access to my pants which he whipped off taking socks and shoes with them. Tina put her hand on the front of my white briefs and squeezed.

“Oh you are a big boy,” she said kissing me again as soon as she could get close enough.

I was on the floor sitting with my back against the sofa, Tina was astride me, her panty-covered lower body grinding my erection and a naked Leo was standing behind her trying to twist her head around to suck his cock. She was completely abandoned in her lust as I now realise some people are when stoned. She hungrily sucked on Leo’s cock and sitting watching a sex act in public almost made me cum without touching myself. I wondered how long I would last when she managed to get around to me. It was Leo who took the lead again, pulling off my briefs. My uncut 8 inches sprung into the air.

“My, that is some cock,” he said, taking it in his hand and squeezing it as though a man handling another was the most natural thing in the world. “I want to see you fuck her,” he continued, nodding to Tina.

She pulled her tights half way down her legs and then, with some difficulty managed to get them off. I saw my first grown-up cunt. Her pubic area was neatly shaved in a “V” shape and her vagina lips were quite pronounced. I could see her red clitoris. She was ready to sit straight down on my cock and it was Leo who stopped her and held up a condom.

“I’d better show you,” he said as he pulled off the wrapper.

He stretched the latex ring and gripped my cock in the same “matter of fact way” stretching it over my cockhead as I held my breath at the excitement of having my cock handled by another person. Soon it was covering my whole cock and as I lay on the floor, Tina stood over me, one leg either side and, as she faced me, a wicked smile on her face, she lowered her body slowly downward. Leo held my cock as he slowly sunk her gaping cunt on to my hard dick. The feeling as her warm body enveloped my cock with a velvet-like, smooth feeling was unbelievable. Tina straddled me and rode herself up and down. I remember thinking how much strain this must be putting on her legs but she was squealing like and excited child as my cock plunged into her. I noted that Leo still held the base and under the pretence of helping my cock stay in Tina, was also caressing my balls. I hadn’t ever thought of a man sexually but the whole experience was highly exciting. I even wondered what it would be like to handle Leo or even suck him.

“Tina, I’m not going to last long. I’m sorry.” I gasped the words out as she canlı casino increased her frantic pumping on my cock.

The sound of Tina reaching orgasm pushed me over the edge and my whole body went into spasm as my balls erupted into her. My staccato thrusts finalised the orgasm and as she lifted off my body, I once again saw Leo carefully hold my cock and take the condom off.

“That’s one Hell of a load mate,” he said, looking at the heavy quantity of white liquid in the teat. I noticed he tied a knot in it and casually laid it on the table behind him.

I remember wondering why he would want to keep my cum and didn’t just discard the condom. I never did find out!

“Fabulous cock for a bible puncher,” said Tina.

I couldn’t tell Roseanne, of course but the threesome with Tina and Leo had released an inner beast in me and my sex drive was rampant. I was masturbating more, I was looking at girls and wishing I could fuck them and, if I’m being honest, I was looking at guys with the same thought. I just wanted sex!

It was some days after the event before Leo and I were alone long enough to talk privately about the night. He confided in me that he had never seen another guy fuck a woman in front of him before and he found the sight of my cock pumping her highly erotic. He apologised for handling my cock but I told him I actually enjoyed it.

“Did you?” he said. “It’s the first time I’ve ever touched another guy and I found it erotic, especially in front of a woman.”

“Me too,” I confessed.

“Want to come round for a drink tonight?” he said with a definite hint of something being planned.

“OK,” I said, not sure what I expected or even wanted from Leo.

After work we cracked a few beers we took a pizza back to Leo’s and had a few more beers. The atmosphere was awkward as we struggled with small talk.

“What are you going to do?” said Leo.

“About what?” I replied

“Your religion, your girlfriend, your sex life, or lack of it,” he said.

“I think I might need to lead a dual life,” I replied. “Roseanne is definitely set on the pure way of life but after last weekend, my hormones are all over the place. I seem to be hard most of the time and all I can think about is getting my rocks off again.”

“If you ever need a hand,” said Leo, his voice fading in a very unsure way as he said the words.

He looked at me and I felt my cock stir. Leo smiled and walked towards me.

“This is alien territory for me but I feel I want to.”

He held my shoulders and kissed my cheek. I grabbed his head and kissed him fully on the mouth, my tongue darting into his mouth. He gasped and then we were like two animals who had just escaped from the zoo. Clothes were ripped off and we ended stark naked in his lounge. He grabbed my arm and almost dragged me into his bedroom, throwing me on the bed and covering my steaming cock with his mouth. If this was new to him, he was a quick learner.

He licked my balls and the traced back up my body to kiss me again. There was some awkwardness as we both tried to take the lead kissing. Teeth clashed and we both laughed. I rolled him on to his back and took great delight in sucking my first cock. He yelped at my clumsy attempt when my teeth caught his foreskin but it didn’t take long to learn. Leo seemed to naturally take the lead and I soon found myself back down on the bed with him above me, my legs lifted as he gently fingered my hole. No one had ever done that and the sensitive feeling was incredible.

“You can’t put it into me,” I said.

“We’ll save that for another day then,” he replied.

The actual session was quite short. We continued with sucking and kissing until he told me he was cumming. I took my mouth off his cock with milliseconds to spare as a fountain of cum splattered over my face and hair. My own cock self-exploded and covered my chest.

“Jeesus,” he said, “you look like an iced cake.”

We laughed but deep down, I liked being iced!

Leo led me to a place I shouldn’t have gone. I had sex with him alone and also with many girls, usually in the next town. It was accepted by Roseanne that I went out with “the lads” one night a week and she thought nothing of it. If she or my parents, or even worse her parents ever found the faintest shred of evidence that I wasn’t “pure” my life would have been Hell and my parents would have left the church.

One odd event was after a church meeting. One Thursday I had been volunteered by my parents to help our Reverend set up some stalls for a ‘bring and buy’ sale to be held in the Church Hall on the Saturday. The Reverend had been called away and I was left with one of his minions who was had been taking the junior choir practice and had been seconded when the Minister had to flee due to a parishioner’s demise. He was quite an attractive young man, around my own age and was unsuitably dressed in the hassock he had been wearing from the practice. It became quite funny as the cumbersome garment made climbing ladders almost impossible.

“Maybe kaçak casino you should pull it off and end up in your shorts and t-shirt,” I jokingly said.

“If I pull this off, you would see a lot more than shorts and t-shirt,” he replied, laughing. “I tend to wear nothing under in on these warmer evenings.”

“A bit risky with a junior choir nearby,” I said.

“Well I have had the odd slip now and then so I think some of them realise.”

He was up the ladder lifting down some trestles when I jokingly put my head under his hassock and said “Maybe there’s not much to see.”

He didn’t move when my head went under and I heard his say, “If you keep looking you may be surprised.”

I looked up to see his balls inches from my face and an erect cock which looked to be about eight inches long.

“God that’s big,” I said.

“Could you give me a hand up here?” he asked.

The hall had a raised stage area at the top and to the right, to accommodate a small dressing area some rooms had been built which did not go all the way to the hall ceiling. Above them and curtained off was an area where we stored items and props. It was this area we had been taking the trestles from and lowering them down the ladder to the hall floor. He disappeared behind the curtain and I followed, slightly closing the curtains as I entered the dimly lit area. He stood, his head almost reaching the hall ceiling with an obscene point in the front of his hassock. He held his finger to his lips as though to suggest I say nothing and he pulled me towards him.

I stood limply as he held me tight and pushed his lips to mine, His tongue entered my mouth and he behaved like a hungry beast. His hands ripped open my belt and my jeans slid down. He lowered himself to kneeling and pulled my pants and briefs down engulfing my half-hard cock with his mouth. He steadied my cock with his right hand encouraging it to full mast as he sucked.

“I’ve wanted your cock since I first saw you,” he said between slurps.

He stood up and lifted his hassock exposing his large cock and ball sacs. I dropped to my knees and reciprocated, licking his balls and his cock as he steadied himself against the wall. I looked up at this weird scene of a man of the cloth, his garments lifted, his white dog collar clearly showing and his eyes closed as I dined on his monster cock.

“Fuck me,” he said.

“How?” I responded. The question was aimed at the fact that I wasn’t sure how to fuck a man and also how to fuck a man with no preparation.

“I was hoping to be fucked by one of the senior choir members tonight and was ready for it. I even lubed myself. The bloody minister then asked me to help you and I had to let him go.”

He rustled in his hassock and handed me a condom. This was getting more surreal by the minute. As he turned, I lifted the garment up and over him and pushed my finger against his anus. He was, indeed, lubricated as my finger slid inside him and he groaned with pleasure. I stretched the condom on to my hard cock and using the spare lubricant gleaned from his arse, coated the latex before pushing my cock against his hole. I gripped his shoulders with both hands allowing my hard cock to slide effortlessly inside him without even the slightest resistance.

My first thought was how all enveloping his arse was. It seemed to grip me in a velvet glove and tightly held my cock in place. It was easy to fuck him and I found the rhythm pleasing as my cock slid in and out. I put my hand around and grasped his thick member, stroking it as I fucked him.

I was close. It was just as well as I heard the hall door open downstairs and someone calling, “Joseph!”

I came inside him and as I did his muffled orgasm sent a stream of cum through my fingers and over my wrist. I hurriedly withdrew and tied the condom, putting it in my pocket and pulling up jeans at the same time.

Again my name was called and as it was I deliberately knocked over one of the trestles and shouted, “Blast, hold it steady Simon.”

“Ah you’re up there boys,” shouted the Minister.

Simon was still mopping up the mess and trying to ensure the cum hadn’t splattered on his black gown as I backed on to the ladder with one of the trestles and we continued bringing it down as though nothing had happened. The Minister seemed none the wiser but then why would he think his second in charge had just been fucked by the fiancée of one of his most fervent parishioners!

I started to have doubts about my sexuality and didn’t continue the relationship with Simon other than the odd grope. My interests were still in women and I realised I just liked sex. How I was going to cope with “Little Miss Goody Two Shoes” in marriage, I had no idea but the option of staying single was actually not an option at all.

The wedding was booked, planned and arranged without really any involvement by me. If I hadn’t been needed for the consummation I’m sure they would have omitted me altogether. Even the honeymoon venue excluded me. It seems our church had links with one in Jamaica and that where Mum and Dad had paid for us to go. Thankfully we were staying in a hotel at a small resort called Port Antonio which was nearer Kingston and the church!!

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